This blog is a zero drama zone.

She’s so much farther along than me… sad emojis all around

Here’s the scenario:

You attended a class, event, or mastermind with another equally smart and talented woman.

Fast forward a few years, and it seems like this woman has dominated the universe.

She has loads of clients. She’s “in” with all the big-name influencers. She even got a book deal with a major publisher. It’s like she’s Khaleesi from Game of Thrones while you’re… some sad, faceless extra who gets trampled in one of the crowd scenes.

You’re thinking, “What gives? How come she’s so much farther along than me?”

Rein in that green-eyed monster. Here are a couple things to consider:

1. You don’t have the full story.

You have no idea what this person’s life—or business—is actually like behind-the-scenes. While everything looks like magical moonbeams and unicorns on social media, it might not be. She pulled off a six-figure product launch? Awesome! But you have no idea what it really took to pull that off and how hard she’s worked. Posting photos with her arms around a famous “influencer”? Great! Maybe they are best friends. Or maybe she invested $100K into a mastermind program to be “friends” with that person. Or maybe they just met at an event and the other person doesn’t know her name. The point is: you don’t know.

My advice: keep your eyes on your own paper. Wish her well, send love, and stop obsessing over her success. Fixating on someone else’s business is just a way of distracting yourself from the work that YOU need to be doing on your own biz.

2. You might have some room for improvement.

Be honest… did you spend most of your morning reading random Facebook posts? Or did you spend that time reaching out to prospective clients to invite them to hire you? There are certain types of “actions” and “habits” that directly lead to sales, enrollments, and exciting opportunities, and others that don’t. Where is your time really going?

If you haven’t been using your time effectively, no judgment, no guilt, and no shame. A new era begins today. Make a pledge with yourself to do better. Be intentional with your time, and hustle like you mean it.

3. You are not her. You are you.

So many people say: “I want to be the next Marie Forleo!” and “I wish I could write like Danielle LaPorte!” and “I want to produce an awesome business podcast, just like Sophia Amoruso’s #GirlBoss podcast!”

It’s great to have role models, and it’s great to read/watch/listen to materials that inspire you. But you are not Marie, Danielle, or Sophia. You are you. And if there’s one thing that women like Marie, Danielle, and Sophia all share in common, it’s that they are unabashedly THEMSELVES.

They confidently put themselves out into the world. They 100% believe in the work they are doing, and they’re out there promoting that work every single damn day. That’s a great example to follow—but you’ve got to bring YOUR unique personality into the mix, not try to mimic their communication style or exact business format.

My recommendation: take a temporary detox from tracking what other entrepreneurs are doing. Stop watching their videos, listening to their podcasts, and commenting on their Facebook updates for a week or two. Give your brain a break. Clear some space. Reconnect with the reasons why you decided to start a business, and reconnect with yourself.

Then: re-commit to running your business YOUR way, on your timeline, without getting caught up in whatever everybody else is promoting, earning, and doing.

Be the Khaleesi of your own kingdom.

Let the other Queens rule theirs.

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